Get back to the center.

    Lately I've been finding myself wandering from my center. At my center, and sometimes I can actually feel my core tugging in there, is God and my trust in Him. There's peace at my center, there's family at my center. Sometimes I wander off. I find myself not joining in conversation with God everyday. I find myself doing fine without Him. This is one of those times. From November to February, I went through a rough patch (nothing too serious, just caught up in the life that is high school and work and dramatic friends). I recognized my need for the Lord every. single. day. Sometimes? I woke up speaking to the Lord. Some days? I prayed for 15 minutes while driving. Sometimes I broke down in the shower- naked and vulnerable both physically and emotionally- I poured it all out to my God and asked Him to pour himself into me. Some days I would excuse myself from class just to sit in the bathroom, take a breather, and soak up some strength from the Lord.  
    Now, however, is a different story. Maybe it's the weather, maybe it's how my mission trip to Mexico changed my heart, maybe it's the people in my life encouraging me... but I feel good. I'm strong, thanks to God and how He taught me to rely on Him and that all strength in this world comes from above. Here's the struggle though... when my heart is breaking and my strength is crippling, its easy, and necessary, to rely on God. But when the seas get smooth and I have no trouble sailing, how do I remember to grasp onto the anchor of my faith and sink in the Lord's grace?
     While I'm figuring this out, I have days, like today, where I stop and realize I still need God. And where am I? Have I strayed from the center? Is my relationship with Him growing a bit distant while I focus on my earthly relationships? And so here I am, making my way back to my center, where my God waits with peace and grace and open arms. Always open arms. 

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